Summer 2009 Rumours

May 28/09

• People want to know... how much pain does it cause PJ Coholan to put on the Wings jersey each Friday night when the Penguins are facing the Wings in the finals for a second year?

• People...know where you waterbottles are at all time. A second one was left behind....muhaha

• Rumour has it that Jumpin Joe went to his ex-teammate Denise Boyko's defense, when League officials where about to strip the Sportsmanship Award away from her, due to her on-ice goonery (resulting in her first penalty ever) last Friday. Joe talked the rest of the GHL brass into letting her keep the trophy by saying, "(Denise) just had a misguided moment on the ice. It will never happen again. Good people sometimes make bad choices. Besides, she makes an awesome Mac!" Denise has apparently agreed to let Joe go on a breakaway the next time the Wings and Flames hook up, as a gesture of thanks.

• Latest prop bet from Vegas - Angie will score before everyone of her old Ranger teammates abandon Farmtown - 3:1. Angie hopefully you will do it this week, cause you may be only looking at a week or two.

• Note to a certain Wing who was heard bragging that it ain't trying if you don't cheat a little. That may be true, but it might be more effective if you don't tell the referee on the way off of the ice after the game. 

• An anonymous source is reporting the Marlene Hodgins has put in a request to League offices requesting that she play on a different team than her husband Ken in the fall. She is reported to have said that 'now that I have some decent players around me and don't have the pressure of trying to make him look good, everyone can see what I am capable of'. Marlene is leading the summer league with 5 goals in just 3 games, while Ken is currently on injured reserve.

• Trades in the works? Reporters have been snooping around GHL headquarters in anticipation of any reports of trades leaking to the press. Although the games have been fairly even, movement is expected to happen within the next week or two.

Apr 20/09

• Celebrity in league? Is Paul McCrane and Ranger Rob Grimwood the same person? People in the GHL did not have any suspicions until photographs were released of Rob wearing glasses. The similarities are uncanny. Paul McCrane is probably best noted for his role as Dr. Robert Romano on NBC's ER(and most recently Graem Bauer on Fox's 24). Robert is best known for his role as defenseman of the year on the GHL's Rangers. 

Apr 18/09

• The banquet was a thriller. Again, I repeat - the banquet was a thriller.

• Rumour has it that in 2028 when a certain person accepts a GHL award, he will say 'this is the second time that I have been mentioned at a GHL awards banquet'. The first was 19 years ago when my parents went to the 2009 banquet and they made a joke about my mom being there. See, I was born just a few hours after the banquet.'  Congratulations to mom Christine and Sean on the birth of Reed Steven Thompson at 12:50 am on April 18th. 

Apr 13/09

• Look for the Rangers to improve greatly in the standings next year. Their farm system has been really strong this year and the whole team is buying into the idea of starting from the ground up.

Apr 12/09

• Transcript from a GHL Finals Interview - Brett: Coach McGrath, have you ever seen the movie Back To The Future where Marty McFly goes back in time and starts to notice that his body parts were disappearing and he couldn't play guitar? Andrew: Ya. Brett: That was awesome. 

Apr 10/09

• The commish was questioned recently by his wife about the websites that he was viewing -- nothing pornagraphic or disturbing -- but rather something perplexing. Mrs. Commish was looking through the browser history on their computer and came across this visited website (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPrE4PXaOrw) and questioned Richard on it. He apologized to his wife and said that he knows that he promised to take ballroom dancing with her, but for now, he has to learn how to breakdance.

• The operators of Facebook have demanded an immediate return to the hockey season. In their complaint they state that a number of GHL members are tying up their network with frivolous arguments over sandwiches. They claim the debate took place over a two hour span, and may have resulted in two members being ejected from Sobey's after a disputed call in the condiment aisle. This caused  the loss of precious time and sent one player home without any bread. Facebook executives indicated the wasted bandwidth could have been used to deliver more "spam" to their followers, and that hockey players should be on the ice instead of on their keyboards.  In a related issue, referee Dan and the Camera Guy are off to Facebook headquarters to remove their "Man Cards", since "Spam" is clearly NOT a sandwich option.

• Mike Dykstra of the Leafs was watching Hockey Night in Canada again, but this time he's pretty sure his name was announced for the Canadiens starting lineup. But it was definately his name. For sure.

• Only 1 week into the offseason and some GHL members are already training for next year. Scott Turner of the Flyers was not very satisfied with the velocity of his shot this year, so he went to referee Dan Durocher to get tips on how to get more mustard on his shot. He wants to be able to raise the puck to where they hide the peanut butter.

Apr 5/09

• The GHL has organized to employ a music coordinator next season. The leading candidate so far is 'attend every concert this summer' Suzanne O'Brien.

• Is the violent side of Tracy Phelps coming out? First it was her physical play in the Finals that caught people's attention. Next it was her penalty minutes in her off season ball hockey. Then as a surprise to everyone, it was revealed her passion for ladder matches during Wrestlemania as she cheered for Kane. 

Apr 4/09

• Best Facebook status of the night by Katie Hatcher - 'Just had her phone remind her to go to hockey but she has no hockey to go to.'

• Clyde, the Virgil Arena Guy, phoned Richard to complain that 5 GHL players showed up to play hockey tonight. He said 'don't you guys ever take a break'?

• Ok, new rumour. Leafs Mike Dykstra was watching Hockey Night in Canada and he swears that he heard Andy Frost announce his name tonight.

• Bored yet? How many times tonight have you checked the rumourmill looking for a new rumour? Now new rumours.

• Apparently the webmaster is also a fan of Brian Schmidt's and did not take too kindly to him being mocked yesterday. He gave a little reminder of his power and wants everyone to lay off picking on Brian. As well, Brian has real humans now sticking up for him when they start to chirp off at him and are willing to fight on his behalf..

Apr 2/09

• In the interest of fairness, the league has also announced that Oilers goalie/Hawks defenseman Brian Schmidt has signed a 1 year extension with the league. His agent (probably imaginary) emailed to the press that his client would like to thank his fans too for all their support this year. Mrs. Schmidt replied 'You're welcome, son. But if your teams do that badly again, I might have to support another player.'

• Contrary to rumours, there will be no entrance fees to get into any of the arenas next year. People that believed this rumour should be feeling very sheepish right now.